If I Could Turn Back Time

My family could probably teach a course on being late. Doctor's appointments, partys, weddings, paying bills,making costumes for the anime conventions we attend (We frequently have to drag a sewing machine with us a well as patterns, glue guns and duct tape (a costumer's best friend).)all fall prey to Murphy's Law. No matter how many lists we make, appointments that go on calenders or we use our crystal ball, life, that nefarious stealer of time. gets in the way.

I enjoy a fantasy series called Xanth, by Piers Anthony. People in this land tend to have one magic talent, big or small, that those in Mundania (our side of the reality) would die or kill for.
One person could turn back time for just a minute. That talent alone could save a lot of heartbreak, since too late is often measured in seconds.

Procrastination is the perfection of lateness. Why do something now if it can be done tomorrow?
Why do something now if tomorrow will render it all unneccesary anyway?

Well, here I am, late again. I usually post this before work on Wednesday. So for your enjoyment:

If I Could Turn Back Time.

A minute here, a minute there
Surely couldn't matter.
If I am late for a date
Of course he will wait
Though he may be mad as a hatter.

It took a little longer
Than I had planned for.
My hair would not behave.
But he was gone when I came down.
I began to rant and rave

It must have been an emergency
That kept him from my side.
I grabbed my coat and
Rushed out the door.
Too late, he was down the drive.

It seems that I have cursed myself.
No matter how I try,
Something always seems
To get in my way
And makes the minutes fly.

I checked the cake, it was almost done.
I ran for the phone and then
I talked so long the cake was black.
Oh no, I'm late again.

I had a lottery ticket
I kept forgetting to check .
It was a winner,
I should have been richer.
But it had expired, oh heck.

So many things I would change,
If I could turn back time.
But one thing I'd never do.
I'd still miss that plane,
Though it made me insane,
Because that was how I met you.

Ring, Ring

That awful sound. Or is it? The phone is something that has expanded so far from it's original design. It is a great way to bring people together or drive you mad with people (and machines) trying to sell you something, ask for donations, or take a survey ("really, it will only take a few minutes of your time") Yeah, right!!.

I'm sure it has saved many lives as well as caused some people to lose their sanity. I find myself with a love -hate relationship with it. I treasure the ability to quickly get in contact with people I know and love, and yet that ring frequently gets on my last nerve.

Let's talk about rings (or should I say ring tones). Giving each person or place it's own special ring allows you to ignore it or run for it. Answering machines can also be a heaven sent thing. If you don't like what you are hearing, you just hit that erase button. Oh what a relief that is.

In my frequent treasure hunts (aka flea markets and yards sales) I came across a very old phone book. The numbers were a combination of rings, not actual numbers. Reading it was like a trip to the past and included many rules of phone use. For instance, it was considered rude to ask the operator to look up the number for you. They are much too busy for that. You couldn't play music near the phone as this may cause people not to hear the conversation. Don't ever get caught listening in on someone elses conversation as this would be a five dollar fine (a huge amount back then) and your phone service would be suspended until it was paid. Children were never, Ever, supposed to use the phone. This was for adults only.

Anyway, as always, there has to be a poem of some sort. This is from a friend's view. I must admit, I share a lot of his feelings.

Ring, Ring

An instrument for destruction
Of my peace of mind.
I lived without it for many years
And did without it fine.
Circumstances played a hand
And it slithered into my life.
Damn thing never seems to shut up.
I might as well have a wife.
There seems to be a mental block
When it's time to pay my bill.
So many other things come first
Like books and beer and girls.
So every so often, I once again
Have peace and quiet and then
I pay the bill and my life departs
To the nether regions, my friend.

Don't even get me started on cell phones
They should all be piled and burned.
Or dig a deep hole and drop a bomb.
It's only what they deserve.
The idiots that don't understand
How rude they are to me
When they answer their phone
while I'm right here.
It was me they came to see.
It could be a way to strengthen the pool
Of genes when they take themselves out.
By talking when driving or crossing the street.
Makes me want to scream and shout.

I must admit, they have their place
For emergencies and such.
A way for people to find each other
When they've been out of touch.
It does have it's uses
But that's not saying much.

I leave you now to go to sleep
And if you call, good luck
I'm going to that wretched thing
And turn the ringer off.

A Love Story (With a Twist)

Castle. The very word conjours up visions of knights in shining armour, fair damsels waiting to be rescued, something that both protects and needs protection. A castle can be evil or good, reality or just "castles in the sky" dreams. They are frequently haunted by spirits both sad and dangerous, occasionally helpful and kind. This tale of mine will have 2 endings. Vote for your favorite.

I think that I shall never see
An edifice as elegant as thee.
Thy towers strong, built of stone.
Often on the blood and bones
Of those who dare attack thee.

A shy maiden waits for her lover's arms
To enfold her and keep her safe from harm.
Not daring to let her sire know
Of the one who waits for her below.
He's not worthy.

The daughter of the castle, fair.
Knows no else could ever compare
To the one who stole her heart away.
Who now rides forth, a dragon to slay
To win her fathers blessing.

To become a knight and win her hand,
A blazing light in this dark land.
To protect all that he holds dear,
He draws his sword and ventures near
The dragon.

His sword, a flashing whirl of steel.
He rushes, the dragon's life to steal.
A hideous roar, a flash of fire
Will not keep him from his hearts desire.
The maiden.

His victory was a hard-won thing.
The dragons head, the proof.
He raced his steed to meet the king
And the maiden on the roof.
His bride.

A happy ending to this tale,
The king doth make him knight.
And the two of them live happily
As man and wife.
Everafterward.


And now the other ending comes.
The valiant knight doth fail
To slay the beast, himself is slain.
Now all doth weep and wail.

The maiden's heart burst with pain.
To her love she runs in haste.
"You shall not leave me here" she cried.
Up the tower stairs, she raced.
"I will join thee now in death,
Life holds no joy for me"
And flung herself from the rooftop high
Her love's soul to meet.

Now the two ghostly lovers tread
The castle's hall at night.
Happy at last to be together,
Their love a blazing light.
Sweet dreams.